A few days ago Twirl revealed he is in love with another boy.
So here's how it happened…I was videotaping Twirl getting Tornado to talk. He was getting Tornado to repeat words. "say C.J." then he turns to me and says "Mommy, do you know who I am in love with? … CJ!!" And I say "ohh you are?" and he says "Yes, I have been in love with him since the day I first saw him on the playground" Twirl had a huge grin and was almost squeezing his knees to his chest in excitement.
His first crush. A boy.
Cory brought up C.J. over dinner and inquired to Twirl why he liked this boy. "I'm just in love with him, I liked his face and I played with him on the playground." Both of us smiled. After the kids went to bed Cory and I were talking about it and Cory said "I remember that feeling" It's true, I remember that too. I remember my first crush. His name was Matthew. It was also in kindergarten. I can't tell you why it was him and not anyone else and I'm sure I couldn't then. I was 6 and I just did. Same with Twirl.
So I already know what tons of people will say "how does he know he likes boys, he's only six" I know this because of Amelia, who so amazingly writes about her son, who is also gay. This is how people responded and still do respond to her stories about her son. I do know that kids are brutally honest, they are not shy about saying what is on their minds. Twirl is telling us how he feels, and he is comfortable doing so because he knows we love him, all of him.
Being gay does not equal sex. Let me just say this one more time, being gay does not equal sex. He knows he likes this boy just like I knew I liked a boy in kindergarten. I didn't have a crush on a girl when I was in kindergarten because I didn't, and it really can be that simple. As adults I think we tend to complicate things that aren't that complicated.
Does this mean we have boxed into being gay and he can never like a girl? Nope. This is new for all of us. I have no idea what happens ten years down the road, all I know is that right now this is what he is telling us. Right now he has a crush on a boy. Actually two, today he revealed he also has a crush on Carter, good to see he is keeping his options open.
Cory and I have been advocates of equality for a long time, when our son started liking more girly things then the stereotypical boy things we became bigger advocates. He writes about this more eloquently then I do. We have had our suspicions but have been careful to let Twirl lead the way. We will continue to let him lead the way whether it's with C.J., Carter or Ella.